Everything is starting to wind down now. Pretty much everything around me is indicating the end of a milestone. Last meeting for APO, my senior box, cap & gown, last set of classes, last set of finals, everyone being generally younger than me. It was a different year than what I had expected. The way my year is ending and how I'm dealing with it is definitely not what I had imagined.
Sometimes, I can be a really horrible person. I think it's human nature for all of us to possess some sort of bad side to counter balance all the "good" we have. Sometimes though, I think I have way too much evil running through my veins. What I really need is to escape and just be honest with myself because that's something I haven't been able to face for a long time-- who I really am. No one really knows me because I don't even want to know myself. Corny, yes, but honest. As you get older, no one has the time to want to get to know you and I am guilty of that as well.
You can't always run away from the things that make you sad or upset because all it does is prove you can't face the truth. All it to takes is one person to show you who you really are and that's when the big picture starts forming. My picture above is me at a walk marathon I volunteered at. It was raining and fucking cold. Even if you're having an amazingly shitty day, even faking it will get you through the day. Just tough it out at all costs.
